Liberté de Pensée et D'Expression

I am donning the NEW as I reflect and RENEW and become more receptive to the Spirit that lives inside of me. I explore my truth, and resist the temptation to censor myself. I must free my expression and share my TRUTH.

Ma photo
Nom :
Lieu : NYC

Resisting Self Censorship

30 novembre 2005

Pass The Rose-Tinted Glasses, Please


This morning I did something that I am usually not able to do---get out of the house on time! Even had a chat w/one of my roommates, and was still able to make it out of the door on schedule. Definitely a feat for me.

Well, everything goes as it always does, except this time, I’m not overwhelmed with the anxiety I feel when I’m late, lol. So, I’m feeling good until I step foot on the train. At first I didn’t know why this particular thing bothered me so much, but I have to say that I became quite pissed.

There was a man sitting on the end to my left, by the door, and he had his leg crossed in the man’s version of crossing your legs. Not knees over one another, but with his left ankle on his right knee. I nearly bumped into his foot. I mean, it was all out in the walkway of the train, and that really annoyed the hell out of me. I sat opposite him, and the more I watched him w/his leg crossed, reading his paper, chillin’, the more my annoyance churned into pissivity.

My first thought: How fcking rude to just have your leg propped up and your foot all out in the way like that.

Second thought: Who the hell does this guy think he is being in the way all like that???

Third thought: This fool is NOT at home in his fcking living room!!!

I will admit that I’m prejudiced. I don’t necessarily like that about myself, but I realize what is true. Most people are prejudiced on some level, to some degree about something. Yet, no one can disagree that white men have been, and very often still are, notorious for creating and perpetuating the systematic oppression of ppl of color and the poor. And like a lot of ppl I know, there is the sentiment that no matter where a wht person goes, they walk about like they own the place. And the way things are going, they will eventually own all our places too. I strive to be one of those ppl who sees these things out from dimly smoky colored glasses. It's the only way to see through the blinding light of the subtle face of racism, class-ism and sexism.

So my mind is spinning as I think about how Harlem is changing and I feel angry, sad and helpless all at once.
Then, I thought: What's so wrong w/this guy just relaxing and enjoying his paper?
I stepped back for a second to wonder whether things really could be that simple. I don't think so. They never really are.

28 novembre 2005

Hearts That Have Bled...

Where Will Our Children Live...

A lonesome warrior stands in fear of what the future brings,
he will never hear the beating drums or the songs his brothers sing.

Our many nations once stood tall and ranged from shore to shore
but most are gone and few remain and the buffalo roam no more.

We shared our food and our land and gave with open hearts,
We wanted peace and love and hope, but all were torn apart.

All this was taken because we did not know what the white man had in store,
They killed our people and raped our lands and the buffalo roam no more.

But those of us who still remain hold our heads up high, and the spirits of
the elders flow through us as if they never died.

Our dreams will live on forever and our nations will be reborn, our bone and
beads and feathers all will be proudly worn.

If you listen close you will hear the drums and songs upon the winds, and in
the distance you will see....the buffalo roam again.

Submitted by:
Tommy Flamewalker Manasco

24 novembre 2005

Romance, Fact or Fiction?

When I think of the Native Americans, I think of a people who are proud of their heritage and proud of who they are. They were generous, open-hearted, kind and loving people. Even though they aren’t able to live a quarter of the lives they once did, they continue to walk forward in who their people once were, and still are. Stories like the one below not only gloss over the Native Americans’ contributions to this country, but over the deceit, manipulative, calculating and opportunistic ways of the white men which devastated their way of life. Greed, selfishness and individualism are the great motivators that have brought men to cheat, steal and create war for resources. The events that took place as long ago as the 15th century are really not as different from those that are happening now. We need to stop looking at history in fragments, but as continuous.

Additional interesting info:
African Native American Exhibit
The Fur Trade as an excuse for disenfranchising the Native Americans?? I wonder...
The Fur Trade
As for the Mountain Men and other counterparts, many of them stayed
active long after the fur decline, as scouts and guides for the army or
as settlers; some became the nemeses of the very people from whom they
had learned so much-they were among the only whites skilled enough
to track the warring Indians.

Because of the rugged Indian-like life-style
of the fur traders-from the French voyageurs and coureurs de bois to the
Hudson’s Bay Company explorers to the American Mountain Men-they, like the
American cowboy, have come to be romanticized.
They certainly were
stalwart, courageous, and individualistic, and, of all the whites entering
the domain of the Indians, perhaps the most appreciative and respectful
of Indian ways.

But there were also those traders who held the Indians in disdain, using
whatever means they could, especially alcohol, to cheat them. Although
there is little comparison between the depredations these opportunistic
individuals imposed on the Indians and those imposed by the the majority
of Spanish conquistadors, for example, who sought to conquer, plunder, and
enslave the Indian population, certain traders might nevertheless be called
the harbingers of an insensitive and exploitative white culture.

23 novembre 2005

A Thanksgiving Story

The Pilgrims who sailed to this country aboard the Mayflower were originally members of the English Separatist Church (a Puritan sect). They had earlier fled their home in England and sailed to Holland (The Netherlands) to escape religious persecution. There, they enjoyed more religious tolerance, but they eventually became disenchanted with the Dutch way of life, thinking it ungodly. Seeking a better life, the Separatists negotiated with a London stock company to finance a pilgrimage to America. Most of those making the trip aboard the Mayflower were non-Separatists, but were hired to protect the company's interests. Only about one-third of the original colonists were Separatists.

The Pilgrims set ground at Plymouth Rock on December 11, 1620. Their first winter was devastating. At the beginning of the following fall, they had lost 46 of the original 102 who sailed on the Mayflower. But the harvest of 1621 was a bountiful one. And the remaining colonists decided to celebrate with a feast -- including 91 Indians who had helped the Pilgrims survive their first year. It is believed that the Pilgrims would not have made it through the year without the help of the natives. The feast was more of a traditional English harvest festival than a true "thanksgiving" observance. It lasted three days.

Governor William Bradford sent "four men fowling" after wild ducks and geese. It is not certain that wild turkey was part of their feast. However, it is certain that they had venison. The term "turkey" was used by the Pilgrims to mean any sort of wild fowl.

Another modern staple at almost every Thanksgiving table is pumpkin pie. But it is unlikely that the first feast included that treat. The supply of flour had been long diminished, so there was no bread or pastries of any kind. However, they did eat boiled pumpkin, and they produced a type of fried bread from their corn crop. There was also no milk, cider, potatoes, or butter. There was no domestic cattle for dairy products, and the newly-discovered potato was still considered by many Europeans to be poisonous. But the feast did include fish, berries, watercress, lobster, dried fruit, clams, venison, and plums.

This "thanksgiving" feast was not repeated the following year. But in 1623, during a severe drought, the pilgrims gathered in a prayer service, praying for rain. When a long, steady rain followed the very next day, Governor Bradford proclaimed another day of Thanksgiving, again inviting their Indian friends. It wasn't until June of 1676 that another Day of Thanksgiving was proclaimed.

On June 20, 1676, the governing council of Charlestown, Massachusetts, held a meeting to determine how best to express thanks for the good fortune that had seen their community securely established. By unanimous vote they instructed Edward Rawson, the clerk, to proclaim June 29 as a day of thanksgiving. It is notable that this thanksgiving celebration probably did not include the Indians, as the celebration was meant partly to be in recognition of the colonists' recent victory over the "heathen natives," (see the proclamation). October of 1777 marked the first time that all 13 colonies joined in a thanksgiving celebration. It also commemorated the patriotic victory over the British at Saratoga. But it was a one-time affair.

George Washington proclaimed a National Day of Thanksgiving in 1789, although some were opposed to it. There was discord among the colonies, many feeling the hardships of a few Pilgrims did not warrant a national holiday. And later, President Thomas Jefferson scoffed at the idea of having a day of thanksgiving.

It was Sarah Josepha Hale, a magazine editor, whose efforts eventually led to what we recognize as Thanksgiving. Hale wrote many editorials championing her cause in her Boston Ladies' Magazine, and later, in Godey's Lady's Book. Finally, after a 40-year campaign of writing editorials and letters to governors and presidents, Hale's obsession became a reality when, in 1863, President Lincoln proclaimed the last Thursday in November as a national day of Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving was proclaimed by every president after Lincoln. The date was changed a couple of times, most recently by Franklin Roosevelt, who set it up one week to the next-to-last Thursday in order to create a longer Christmas shopping season. Public uproar against this decision caused the president to move Thanksgiving back to its original date two years later. And in 1941, Thanksgiving was finally sanctioned by Congress as a legal holiday, as the fourth Thursday in November.

22 novembre 2005

The Element of GENIUS

I had seen previews for Oprah's 20th Anniversary show and decided to record it, and I'm so glad I did. Below is a piece that Sidney Poitier wrote for her. Even though he's talking about Oprah and how she has inspired so many and helped so many more, his words were an inspiration to me and sparked something inside of me to do more, reach higher and be successful on my own terms. So, I wanted to share this, and I hope Mr. Poitier's words light the fire of GENIUS in each of you, too.
*************************************************************

The Element of Genius
Indeed does genius have a shape or a form?
If we cannot spot it by size or shape
Then how do we know we are in its presence?
Might we have been privileged to witness
Moments of genius in Oprah Winfrey’s vision
Over these past 20 years
During which genius, or something akin to it,
Inspired millions of her fellow Americans
To stand tall in their personal lives and reach beyond their limits.
That genius is echoing still in the hearts and minds of many
Who were encouraged to the nurture the goodness in themselves,
And ready themselves to take the reins of their lives
Into their own hands and hold them firmly and have a say
In what direction their journey through life should take.
In these past 20 years, America’s media industry,
As extraordinary as it was, would have been considered less vibrant
Without the genius of Oprah Winfrey, or something akin to it.
As an audience you have seen her vision on your screen.
As a friend, I have seen it in action.
For 20 years, it has remained something to behold.
Congratulations, Oprah, from all of us for these past 20 years,
And for the light you’ve brought that shines so gently
On those who need it most.

17 novembre 2005

This Is IT, I Promise!! LOL

Friday, Nov. 11th:

A friend of mine was invited to an (art) opening, and I very casually invited myself along. (so casually that she thinks she invited me, lol) We hung out for a bit at the spot where she is having a bday party w/one of her friends, talking a Scotsman and a black guy. They were something else! The black dude watches a lot of TV so he and I had a lot to discuss, and once the Scotsman realized I knew who Dan Brown was, he couldn’t stop telling me how much he enjoyed his books. “Remember to read Angels and Demons first...” He actually read The Da Vinci Code twice. I certainly hadn’t seen that coming! But good for him. Especially since he’s not much of a reader. I’m sold.

Well, me and my friend hopped a cab to head over the opening, and filled each other in on our lives on the way. We hadn’t hung out since the Party (and yes, I asked about those damn pictures! Demanded, even...), so there was much to discuss. As we approached our destination, we heard loud music, and my friend starts screaming, and nearly pushes me out the cab. She runs up the street yelling, “It’s the band! It’s the band!” as I run behind her, bewildered and trying to keep up. Well, once we made our way to the crowd, I understood what was up. The artist had hired the Malcolm X Shabazz School band to perform, and believe me when I tell you they were killin’ it!! High school kids, mind you. It’s a shame they can look so grown up so young. All the percussionists were freakin’ it, the trumpet players were freakin’ it, and the two drum majors were definitely freakin’ it.

Well, Kehinde's work is quite amazing! There were four paintings in one large room, and in a smaller space toward the front, there were various sketches and a video being shown of how the painting were drawn, since he used live models and horses. I couldn't help but be impressed with his work.

My friend introduced me to the artists, curators and buyers, and I decided to step outside of myself and initiate conversations with some of the ppl standing close by. I met some very interesting folks, and was glad later that I had done this. After standing about chatting for a while, we decided to head over to the dinner reception.

If I hadn't seen this place with my own two eyes, I would not have believed it could exist. But that's what I love about Manhattan...there are so many hidden treasures in the most inconspicuous places. I don't remember who owned this place, but once you walked up the sets of stairs to the main floor your breathe would be taken away. For all intents and purposes, I would call this place a mansion. It was HUGE!! Man, I wish I could have taken photos! It was absolutely beautiful...

My friend and I ended up sitting w/the artist's mom, sister and his sister's friends. After a while we were all just cracking up and having ourselves a great time. LA was itching to get out and into something, so it ended up that the group was going to a place called Chichiz. This was the first black gay bar I'd ever been to, and it ended up being some of what I expected, but more of what I didn't expect. The food was great, the music was good, and everyone seemed to be having a good time. I'd already met and talked to most of the ppl who were there, so it was nice to mix and mingle in a more close setting. Our group took over a huge area by the wall, and everyone talked, drank and danced. The straight bar boy (he wasn't a bartender, so I'm not sure what his job is called) didn't believe that 3 of us were the ages that we were, and he couldn't get enough of my friend. And he was a cutie, too! The only downside for is that he was young as hell! lol The last remnants of us got kicked out around 4am, and by then, they were ready for us to go. And made no bones whatsoever about letting us know.

Everyone stood outside the bar, and we made our goodbyes, and I hopped a cab w/a couple the artists I met who were heading uptown. I didn't get home until 4:30, and I slept until almost noon the next day. But, I had fun like I haven't had in a long, long time!!

16 novembre 2005

Adventures in NYC: Part DEUX

Okay, this is Part II, but not the whole story. So, I feel it's my duty to bless you guys w/a part three to quest your insatiable thirsts, lol! This has turned into a busy week, but I want to share my stories w/you...there is more! :) And I will revise this post to include the pic of the flyer for the artist's show... you gotta see it!

Nov. 10th (con't):
Now, b/c the keyboardist for the opening band was so gracious to us, I’m going to keep any extra comments to myself. EB has spoken to him since the concert, and he is very proud of his band. I will say, though, that I agree w/EB in that TH needs to learn some band-iquette and take the time to introduce all the members of his band at the end of their set. And a sidenote from me: Next time, don’t embarrass your drummer by making him stand hunched over to the side while you take over his position in an attempt to show off your percussion prowess. Okay, yeah, I was a little impressed (b/c I didn’t expect that in a BAZILLION years!), but I didn’t that was the time or place for that shit.

You all can check them out and draw your own conclusions.


The only other thing I will add is that the guitar player reminded me of Jay from Jay and Silent Bob (though much shorter), and I couldn’t understand why the back-up singers wore what looked to me like hunting caps. *hunched shoulders* And, I probably won’t ever figure that out. Maybe they need an image consultant, too...

14 novembre 2005

Adventures in NYC: Part ONE

DISCLAIMER:
My computer is still down right now, and I’m limping along the best way I know how. So PLEASE bear with me. :)
*****************************************
The latter part of last week was probably one of the best times I have had in I don’t even know how long. I realize that I should give myself a break sometimes from having to have every single thing planned out and be spontaneous, and that’s pretty much what I did. And I’m very happy to report that my doing so had exceptional results.

Wednesday, Nov. 9th:

I went to a martial arts class, and had a really great time. Usually I feel uncomfortable around ppl that I don’t know, and even though this was the school where my friend is a Master, that didn’t relieve me. I also have a problem w/ppl standing all close to me (especially while I’m eating), and there were a few ppl doing that, so the annoyance only added to my discomfort. Well, I finished my “dinner” and class got under way. Once the instructor started talking about all the things we would learn, how the class would be structured and the props we would need, I was good. The class went well, and I am quite pleased to say that I know how to break a person’s shin, defend myself with keys or a pen and how to subdue someone with an amazing grapple hold. I had everyone in the class cracking up, b/c every time the instructor gave us a tid bit of useful info on how to injure someone in a hostile situation, I couldn’t help but be overcome with joy. Yeah, I’m a little psychotic, I know, but I have to say that I felt empowered when I walked out of there, and would suggest that other women take this class as well.

Thursday, Nov. 10th:
EB went w/me to SOBs to see if we could get into the
Floetry concert. I arrived first and waited in a huge line (but not too hug) to try to get in at the door. We didn’t have advanced tickets, but I figured we should just try our luck at the door and see what happened. EB went to check, and the guy told her that tickets were sold out, but to come back around 9:30p. We decided to come back later, so we headed around the corner from the spot. Well, we ran into some guys standing outside, and what happened next makes me a firm believer in big, beautiful natural hair. One of the guys was feeling my friend’s hair, so he started chatting her up. EB asked if he could hook us up w/tickets, and after more conversation, he said that he’d see what he could do. She took his number and we were off.

I didn’t think too much of it, but EB was convinced that we’d somehow get in. We walked for a while, and all the while my feet are killing me from wearing the high ass shoes I had on. Finally, we stopped for a slice and I got a chance to rest my tired dogs. Cuz believe me, they were woofin’!!! She called him to see what the deal was and he didn’t have any info, so we talked for a while. Then, he called her back. He said for us to meet him back where we were before. We jetted out of the pizza shop and high-tailed it back to the side of the club. Well, as it turns out, this guy was the keyboardist in the band that would be opening for Floetry. So, he told us to stand w/the entourage to go in the side door. Well, we get to the door, and the bouncer is telling ppl that if they are not w/the band, then they need to go get checked in on the guest list...at the FRONT. At that point, the whole group of ppl that we were standing with headed in that direction, but we did not, my friends...SUCKAAAASSSSS...

The door guy stopped us and told us the same thing he’d told everyone else, but EB, with her quick thinking self said that we were with the band, and he let us in. WHHOOOOO!

So, as it turns out not only did we still get to see Floetry, but we got to see them for FREE!! I’m going to refrain from saying too much about the opening act, as they were something special to behold. I will have to hit you all with the link later, lol!! Pure comedy!

Floetry on the other hand, put on such an amazing show, one would not believe. Even the chick behind us (who complained about our hair blocking her view...uh, well, sorry...) could not ruin it for me. They played a mix of old tracks, new tracks, and old school shit to keep the crowd hype. It was such a beautiful thang! I am officially a fan...ahhhh....

It’s getting late, and I have to get to Mr. Kitty, but I will finish up tomorrow! I'm gonna share more about the concert, but hang on to your hats, b/c just when you thought this was good, FRIDAY night was off da hook, too! LOL

08 novembre 2005

All Late and After The Fact

But so what, I don't care, lol. I got tagged by Alli at a time when I wasn't up on my reading...so...here goes nuthin'...

7 things I plan to do before I die:
Re-learn French.
Get out of debt.
Own property.
Visit Africa.
Work for myself.
Have a family of my own.
Adopt more pets.


7 things I can do:
Work with my hands. (in more ways than one)
Lend a listening ear.
Watch TV all damn day and only get out of bed to pee.
Tie a cherry stem in a knot w/my tongue. (this I have done a couple times, so it counts, dammit!)
Write poetry.
Spoil my kitty (cat).
Comfort a friend.


7 things I cannot do:
Iceskate or rollerblade.
Ride a horse. (although, I've never done it, so maybe I can, I just don't know)
Stick to a budget.
Deal w/random bullsht.
Get anywhere on time. (most of the time)
Add huge numbers in my head.
Cry on request. (I'll laugh instead)


7 things that attract me to the opposite sex:
Intellect.
Generosity.
Kindness.
Consistency.
nice, FULL Lips.
Broad shoulders/back.
A little bit of a bad boy. (but not too bad..let's not get it twisted!)


7 things that I say most often:
Yeah...aiiight!
Whatever, Loser.
Say word...
Da fck/Da hell???
R U Serious???
I'm sayin', yo...
Girl, please!


7 celebrity crushes:
Adam Rodriguez (CSI: Miami)
Orlando Bloom
Maxwell
Damon Wayans
Ice Cube
Allen Iverson
Matthew McConaughey

**added BONUS**
Fiddy CENTS's body (yeah, just the body, thanks...)

07 novembre 2005

Saw This And I Couldn't Resist


This is what Mr. K would have done for me had he had the resources...lol :)


05 novembre 2005

It's My BIRTHDAY...It's My BIRTHDAY...

Another year of life granted, another year of opportunity given...

03 novembre 2005

I'll Always Be in Love With...

Yeah, I saw that "cracked out" picture of K-Ci, Tevin and Al B. a friend of mine sent me. And the first two DEFINITELY looked like they've been dried up and spit out from the throws of a crackpaloosa. But, my baby, my heart, should still be my first baby's daddy, Al B. Sure! is still sexy to me. Just the sight of this man (and especially this photo) makes me want to do very explicit things...

His lips are unbelievable. I hope he knows how succulent they still are. What can I say??? I've had a crush on this cat since I was in middle school (or jr. high for the NYCers). I have a long history of countless fantasies about him and I and all the stuff we would do (that I actually had no clue about) while listening to my Nite and Day 45. Oh Hell yes, I had a 45 of this single that I used to play on my aunt's stereo in her basement back in the day!! Oh HELL yes!!!

The few times I made it to NYC as a child, I would think of him as I hungered after the cute boys with the high-top fades as we drove by. To see this man is to take me back to a time of innocence and sweetness nearly forgotten. I searched his music on MSN and couldn't help but grin ear to frickin' ear as I lip sync'd the words to every song from In Effect Mode. Al B. will always hold a special place in my heart. He's so dear to me...

However, should I see said man on the street, now that I'm grown, he is in SO MUCH TROUBLE!!! LOL